Jen's Safari: One Tanzanian Wedding

On our third Saturday in Tanzania, the E.I. staff had been invited to an authentic Tanzanian wedding. Thomas, the E.I. house guard was getting married and through Andrew and Miriam’s connections with him, the interns were guaranteed a part in this celebration. What a great opportunity to attend a “real” Tanzanian wedding in the first month!

On the morning of the wedding, Andrew was busy picking up the bride, Neema (Kiswahili for Grace), her bridal procession and such important characters. Miriam was left with the responsibility of taking the interns and giving another group of wedding attendants a lift to the wedding. As we neared the groups of family and friends waiting for our ride, it was visibly not a small group. We crammed in about 20 women and children in the LandCruiser, leaving the men behind to wait for the next round of pick-up. After getting everyone to the church for the wedding, the ceremony was finally starting. As the guests waited for the bride to enter, we all sang, sang and sang. Actually, we sang throughout the wedding whenever there was a gap of long waiting or silence, when there was confusion between the organizers about the program and just about anytime there was no one giving a speech.

With the groom and his best man in the front, in absolute solemnity, the bridal procession made their grand entrance. Leading the procession were four girls, in choreographed dancing, followed by the flower girl and bridesmaid. Then, as we all cheered loudly and the women yelling in high-pitched “lelele”s, an even gloomier bride joined the sad groom in the front of the church for prayer and a preaching on marriage. It is customary for the bride and groom to keep a straight, saddened face as a sign of respect for their parents as they are leaving their original family to start a new family. There was strictly no smiling while the rest of the guests laughed and screamed hysterically. It seriously takes some skill to keep a completely detached expression from all the happiness around. It was impossible to tempt the bride into anything close to a smile, while we caught glimpses of Thomas bursting the bubble and give a held-back smirk once in awhile. The bride and groom sat in chairs listening to the preaching while the best man and bridesmaid was closeby, always ready to do some kind of grooming job on the couple, either wiping their sweats or fiddling with the veil and dress throughout the day. After the vows were given, the papers signed and the couples blessed by the pastors and family and friends, the Christian ceremony ended and everyone made their way to a nearby house for the reception.

There was a large procession of dancing men and women leading the newlyweds to the reception place. After every guest settled down and took a seat, the program began. An extremely tall woman who spoke at a speed of 10 sentences per minute was the Master of Ceremony (M.C.). There were loud speakers playing Christian, upbeat, Kiswahili music in the background controlled by a D.J. It was very festive and everyone was in the mood to have some serious dancing, laughing and celebrating.

One of the highlights was the procession of gift givers. Different groups of guests were called to lavish their gifts to the couple by dancing up each gift in a throng. So the men and women, family and friends all lined up, dancing, moving to the rhythm of the music showing off their presents and surrounding the couple, blessing them. It was so lively and most enjoyable, with endless laughter. Previously, in preparation for the wedding, we went gift shopping, trying to pick out the most suitable gift. Trying to match our personal taste to the bright colored, motif-filled designs on the different kitchen accessories took us a long time to make the final decisions. After looking through many houseware shops, we settled for a light brown-colored thermos and a set of 6 brown mugs (our safest option). With previous warning, we knew that none of us could escape the dancing-the-gift-up part. As the mzungus (Andrew, Miriam and the interns) got ready for our turn at the wedding, not one Tanzanian at the party could keep their mouths from closing, gearing up for a hilarious sight – White people dancing! We took courage and wobbled to the front, giving the guests a real treat and the greatest, loudest laughs with our awkward dancing. (Later, a Tanzanian friend at the wedding informed me that I could dance well which was a great honor.)

From beginning to end, the music, the loud M.C., the 4 dancing girls and the laughter did not stop while the bride and groom looked upon this event through their sad expressions. Randomly, the guests would take up the microphone and either give a speech, dance or sing. The main pastor, whenever he gets a chance at the microphone would start another sermon. At the end, glorious food was served. Joe and I tried eating with our hands which was harder for us as we are accustomed to using utensils. However, food seems to taste better when we use our hands. The dinner was comprised of gigantic pots of rice, pilau, vegetarian dishes (cooked plaintain, potato, beans, etc.) and meat dishes. Everyone was full by the end of the day, we ate until our stomachs could stretch no more and were tired from the laughing. It was a happy day, and I sincerely wish Thomas and Neema the same happiness for their long road together even through the rough times.